I have never had problems with my temper. In fact when I was younger it was something I thought I had going for me, but I swear that child will be the death of me! Today I was hit, kicked, scratched (enough that you can see blood), and took a toy cell phone to the chin (still hurts) because I said we needed to go to the store. I don't know what to do with him! We do timeouts, he thinks they are funny, he moves his chair over to the wall so that he can pick paint off the wall. And when I finally get him to stay in timeout, it fixes the problem- only temporarily. He has had the computer taken away permanently, until he earns it back. I know he is a good kid. I just don't know what else to do.
Today I asked him why he was doing what he was doing. He told me that "Bad James thinks it is funny." What do I do with that? So I said, "Can you see that it isn't funny?" He said, "Yeah, but I'm not Bad James anymore." I asked how we keep bad James away. He said to tickle him. What?
Any other ideas?
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3 comments:
Brooke,
I don't know how you feel about spanking, but if time-outs aren't working and his tantrums have escalated this much, I would try it. First of course letting him know the new consequence for his actions.
Not saying it's right in all situations, but my PhD Marriage and Family Therapist agrees-sometimes spanking is the answer.
Paul Robison, a parenting teacher at BYU said, "If a child knows that you will spank you do not have to spank often."
Good luck and have courage! My kids just knowing they could get a spanking keeps them out of trouble and I don't have to spank hard for them to take it seriously.
I finally got to reading blogs and found your post without any comments, so I figured you might need a bit of a boost. Problem is, I have no good advice for you and I don't have a clue what to do. That's sure helpful, right? I know there are books out there you can read, but I haven't read any of them. Abby has never been really aggresive or defiant, but I've noticed she is more so when she's tired or hungry. So maybe he's tired or hungry. Good luck and you're a great mom! You can do it!
YIKES! This is a tricky one. I totally don't know what to do about the Jekyll and Hyde scenario. I'd try to give him as much ownership over his behavior as possible. It's HIS choice to act a certain way, but the consequences aren't his choice. I think finding something that REALLY means a lot to him and taking it away might help. Good luck!!
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